My wife was in a horrible accident, the doctor came out and said, “I’m sorry, she’s not going to make it.” Which is funny, because that’s pretty much what she said before she fell down the stairs when I asked her for a sandwich.
Read More »3 dreams of a man
3 dreams of a man: To be as Handsome as his Mother thinks. To be as Rich as his Child Believes. To have as many Women as his Wife suspects.
Read More »Saying Yes or No to wife
My Wife thinks that I Sneak out at night to smoke Weed and get stoned, Because my eyes are always blood shot. I nod and agree with her… It’s better than saying most Girls carry Pepper Spray these days.
Read More »Please come fast
(Husband calls up Hotel Manager from his hotel room): . “Please come fast ..! I am having an argument with my wife and she says she will jump off the window of your hotel …!!!” . . MANAGER : Sir, I’m sorry but its your personal matter. . . Husband
Read More »A Couple never fought in 25Yrs
A Couple never fought in 25Yrs!!! . A friend asked – How did you make it possible?? . . Husband – We went to Shimla for our Honeymoon, While Horse riding My Wife’s Horse jumped & my wife fell down, she got up, patted the Horse’s back & said “Dis
Read More »Is there anything else your wife doesn’t use?
A wife arriving home from a shopping trip was horrified to find her husband in bed with a lovely young woman. Just as she was about to storm out of the house, her husband stopped her with these words: “Before you leave, I want you to hear how this all
Read More »Baby I want to tell you something
Boy : Baby I want to tell you something Girl : Yes? Boy : When you go home today thank your mom for me. … Girl : Okay but why? Boy :Thank her because she gave birth to an angel in this earth who is my life and to whom
Read More »Love someone that remains forever
There was a wife who daily sent her husband a rose when ever she was out. 1 day she died, still her husband received a Rose everyday. He was shocked, he asked the Floweriest… He told him that his wife had paid advance for his whole life. So… Love someone
Read More »WE are PREGNANT!
“I AM PREGNANT” she TOLD her MAN… He SMILED and KISSED her LIPS and said “CORRECTION MY LOVE we ARE pregnant. FOR that CHILD in YOUR womb is HALF of ME and HALF of YOU; and I will NOT let YOU go THROUGH the PREGNANCY alone… I may NOT carry
Read More »Wife comes home late at night
Wife comes home late at night and quietly opens the door to her bedroom. From under the blanket she sees four legs instead of two! She reaches for a baseball bat and starts hitting the blanket as hard as she can. Once she’s done, she goes to the kitchen to
Read More »Why don’t you try using…
My wife was brushing her teeth this morning when I noticed she was spitting blood. I said, “Why don’t you try using Corsodyl Mouthwash?” She said, “Fuck off, why don’t you try keeping your fists to yourself.”
Read More »Quarrel and revenge
A couple drove down a country road, not saying a word. An earlier discussion had led to an argument, and neither would concede their position. As they passed a barnyard of mules and pigs, the wife sarcastically asked, “Relatives of yours?” “Yep,” the husband replied. “In-laws.”
Read More »Didn’t see wife for few days
Husband came home late at night from a party. His wife shouted : How would you feel if you don’t see me for 2 days? He couldn’t believe his luck. He replied at once.”That would be great..!” Monday passed & he didn’t see her. Tuesday & Wednesday passed too. On
Read More »Angry wife to her husband
An angry wife to her husband on the phone. Wife : Where the hell are you? Husband : Honey, do you remember that gold shop where you saw the diamond necklace & totally fell in love with it? Wife(relaxed) : Yes, my king Husband: Remember I had no cash to
Read More »Today is my marriage
LOVE STORY OF ENGINEER : I was in 12th She was in 12th . I got B.Tech She got BA . I was doing B.Tech She got M.A . I was preparing for M.TECH entrance, She got married . I m doing M.TECH She is the mother of 2 children
Read More »I found something
Massage After nearly 50 years of marriage, a couple was lying in bed one evening, when the wife felt her husband, begin to massage her in ways he hadn’t in quite some time. It almost tickled as his fingers started at her neck, and then began moving down past the
Read More »Would you have married me?
Once a man questioned his wife, “Would you have married me if my father hadn’t left me any fortune?” “Dear hubby, I’d have married you… NO Matter who left you a fortune!” She replied softly.
Read More »Can You give me a push?
A man and his wife are awakened at 3 o’clock in the morning by a loud pounding on the door. The man gets up and goes to the door where a drunken stranger stands in the pouring down rain. “Can you give me a push?” he asks while hanging onto
Read More »Which is worse?
Once a man was hospitalized to have his wedding ring cut off from his penis. According to the nurse attending the operation, the patients girlfriend found the ring in his pants pocket. She didn’t know he was married… She was so mad at knowing that so she used jelly and
Read More »Where is your wife?
Hey check this one A man takes his seat at a FIFA world cup final. He looks to his left & notices that there is a spare seat between himself & the next guy. MAN: “who would ever miss the FIFA world cup final?” GUY: “that was my wife’s seat.
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